The hardest part of the day.........

is Monday through Friday from 7:30am to 3:30pm.......all I want to do is eat, eat and eat some more (not s'mores......but they do sound good!)! Today I had cereal for breakfast, 2 - 100 cal snack pack, box of raisins, pasta salad for lunch and 1 hard boiled egg w/no yolk.......and I am starving! I am busy during this time but all I want to do is eat and think about eating! This drives me insane. So I eat something little thinking it will go away but it doesn't. I wish there was a magic pill to make this go away but there isn't. Luckily when I went to 7-11 I didn't buy anything bad because I would be digging into that now......also Pauline was with me and I knew better becuase she would take it away. The plus side is that we did 1 lap at Votee in 22 minutes and I have 2711 aerobic steps today.....good for me. Working inventory later so I know I will not get a walk in! So I guess I will have a mint, sucker or lollipop and get back to work and try not to think about food. I have some watermelon and will try to wait till 3 pm to have that!!! Good luck to me!!!!

The three hardest words to say...

No, not the three words you might be thinking of....nothing as mushy and sweet as "I love you". For me, the 3 hardest words to say are "No, thank you". I think part of it is that I'm a "people pleaser" - I like to see everyone happy and if saying yes to something I know I should have makes someone happy, I'll do it. I also think part of it is not accepting the reality of being overweight (technically, obese - but I can't wrap my head around that). I don't "feel" obese, if that makes sense - I know I have tons of clothes I can't wear, some that I felt I totally rocked 20 lbs ago...but, I still think I have this disconnect from reality. So, it's hard to say no to something when you don't fully grasp how much work there is to do. I mean, I see the numbers - I'm a huge numbers person so I have iPhone apps, graphs, charts....you name it. I have goals and projections, fully aware of when I should hit goals and milestones...yetI still have a hard time accepting that this is my reality. My husband is naturally thin and a part of me that "forgets" I can't keep up with him - and sometimes, I just need to say "no, thank you" when it comes to something he can have/do that I shouldn't/can't. For example, on Saturday, after a long hike/walk, we went to Ben & Jerry's - I had every intention of getting yogurt (at least it was better than ice cream) but when Mike ordered me the regular ice cream, I didn't speak up. Then the woman said "two scoops, right" and I should have said "No, thank you - one is fine)....but, I didn't. I knew I was consuming 400+ calories of ice cream but I couldn't speak those words. (for the record, I only went over for the day by 68 calories! :) I guess I feel like saying "no, thank you" is like wearing a scarlet letter that says "watch out, she's obese - do not feed her!!" Yes, I have many, many issues which is why I'm still in the shape that I am in. But, I'm becoming more aware and I'm ready to start finding my voice...it's a painful journey at times, though.

Jen's plan and pitfalls....

Since I'm the only one currently set up, I figured I'd start with some personal stuff about me - I have been married to my husband for almost 13 years, together for over 18 years. We have a 10 year old son whom I love more than life itself! :) I work as an aide in my son's school, so I'm on his schedule and off in the summers. I don't love it, though, and miss being in an office and creative on the computer - by next year, I will be looking to go back to some kind of admin job. For right now, though, this situation works well.

As for my plan....I've done WW's in the past many, many, many times. (Right, Laurie??) :) I think it's a great plan and it works, when you work it. I lost 25 lbs once, my biggest success. But, I hate counting points (there, I said it! :) I just feel at this point, if I'm going to be counting something, it may as well be calories - it's easy enough to do for the rest of my life, the formula doesn't change every few years. I truly feel that it all comes down to calories in vs calories out. I will be using an iPhone app called "Lose It" to help me. Lose it tracks your calories, your weight, your exercise, etc. I put into the application my starting weight of 186 (highest weight ever, and 2nd time I've been there), my goal weight (130 lbs - which at 5' 3" and 40 years old, works just fine for me) and how much I want to lose per week - it gives you the option of anywhere from a half pound to 2 lbs a week. I picked 1 1/2 pounds per week, so it set my calories at 1403 per day and says that I will be at goal by April 14, 2011 (which is about 8 1/2 months). If slow and steady wins the race, then I'm good with that - it's not about racing to the finish line, it's about finishing. If you exercise, it does give you back those calories to eat (so, if I burn 300 calories at the gym, I will have 1703 for that day) but I plan on that being my "cushion" - there if I need it. As for exercise, that's harder - my husband leaves for work at 6 am and is home at 4:30 - so, since it's summer, I home all day with my 10 year. I would love to be the type of person to get up at 5 am and hit the gym before Mike leaves, but that's not going to happen right now when I don't have to be up. I hate to exercise at night but I will work on that. Once school is back in session, I will work on a more formal gym routine of getting there at least 4 to 5 times a week - but for now, the plan is to just move more and hit 10,000 steps a day. For now, I will hit the gym when I can, but will find ways to move every day, whether its walking, wii fit, etc.

My biggest pitfall is late night eating - always has been, always will be. I can be on target all day and crumble at night. By 10 pm, the male occupants of the house are off to bed and it's just me, the TV and usually a great book - oh, and snacks! :( It's just boredom, emotional, stress (etc.) eating and I know that, but it's still always been a battle for me. At some point going to bed earlier might make sense, but I really love my "me" time. Finding balance will be the goal.

Another pitfall is not being a fruit and veggie person - Kate, Laurie and I come from a large Irish family where our Mom cooked to please our Dad - so, everything was bland, dried out or processed.



Some of us have broadened our horizons since then, but me, not so much. So, I will be working on that, but I do believe that no food is off limits - portion control will be a huge part of this and I truly believe in everything in moderation. I can't say that I'll never have another piece of cake or a drink - that's not fun to me. Life is about balance, not deprivation. (IMO). So, we'll see how balance, moderation, portion control, with making strides towards healthier choices, and moving more work for me.

I will also plan motivational rewards along the way, but more about that later..... :)

So, who's next? What's your plan?